What we have learned from 2017 (part 1)

A lot!

… no, rather nothing, right?

Last year, one thing was missing: bravery
Fear is very effective. If you do not face it with bravery, the fear always wins. Let it be the small fears that you encounter again and again in everyday life or the fear that is used by other people as a “weapon”.

At work, privately, but also in society. Professionally, I was in the consulting industry for a long time. IT sector. Although there was an immense shortage of skilled staff, I was (and many other colleagues too) often not esteemed, emphatic and value-oriented led by my superiors. At that time, the term “healthy leadership” did not even exist.

No, it was almost and almost everywhere very authoritarian. One had to respect “The Big Boss”. To maintain this status, “The Big Boss” has repeatedly used THE MOST effective “weapon”: fear.

Today we know that impending punishment is more “motivating” and thus more effective than praise. This is the efficacy of the fear and at the same time this anxiety-promoting “leadership style” creates even more fear among the employees. I have seen it many times. But seeing this “phenomenon” I really  wonder, which employee did not experience that? Dear “Leaders”, you can be happy, because you too are capable of learning. New Year New luck 😉

 

What did we learn last year?

That most “executives” still lack the courage to leave behind the “The Big Boss” role and to go new – more respectful – ways.

 

# BeBrave – and question always your way of communicating. Just listen to your heart. Would you let yourself be treated as you treat your employees, colleagues and fellow human beings?

 

 

Sorry? Do I wrote “executives” in quotes? Yes exactly! For all people who guide or take other people in any way are leaders. Dear parents, older siblings, doctors, nurses, emergency services, kindergarten teachers, caregivers, pilots, etc., you are all responsible, just like politicians. They show other people the way. They give orientation. They use a variety of “tools” such as motivation, empathy, sensitivity, knowledge, strength … and fear. Fear was also in 2017 a “very effective” tool, especially on a political level. No, you’re right, it is rather a very effective weapon. Unfortunately. Fear is given to you extrinsically, to intrinsically create more of it. Then comes action or just non-action. Because just as in communication, where you know that non-communicating does not exist (you always do it, verbally as well as non-verbally), there is no non-doing in doing. To “let it be” does not mean that it has no effect. An example of this was the 2017 general election in Germany. There were those who did something (= chosen), whether with fear or not and those who did nothing (= not elected). The latter had an impact on the former. Everything has always has an effect. Especially anxiety.

 

What did we learn last year?

That you can not do nothing and that fear is a purely evil tool.

Be brave and choose the good. Destroying something is easy, but creating something, building something and solving problems that nobody in the world can run away from (btw, welcome to reality!) is much more difficult.

“More difficult? So what? Bring! Come here, here is courage.” I need that from you, we need it from the whole world. The one who were the first in taking the lead has always existed …

 

 

One for all. All alone.

Delimit. Secede. Separate. Fight. Abuse. Build boundaries.

Short question: Do you really wonder that children in this world are growing up with fear? Oh, fear has an effect, right? Also seen in the long run …

• The German Federal Psychotherapeutic Chamber (BPtK) known: Mental illness in 2016 have been the second most common reason for company absences after musculoskeletal disorders such as back pain. A few years ago, the “mental illnesses” were still in third place.
• Every second person suffers from a mental illness in the course of his life

Why are you doing this to yourself? Why are you doing it to your children? You do not feel addressed? What are you doing when you experience it? What is it? I like to repeat it (no, not “like”, but still): Delimit. Secede. Separate. Fight. Abuse. Build boundaries.

The answer hides in it. It is certainly not doing nothing and hiding. It is your courage. Because you act, one way or the other. Nowadays also global. Whether you like it or not. So go ahead. If that does not work then go with the brave ones. They are out there. Believe it or not.

Together we fight evil for the good.

 

What did we learn last year?

That we separate to be with those we choose. Those who like us are there, everyone else is not. But, the world has never worked this way. For those who are for it will perceive those who are against it. And those who oppose it will always perceive those who are against it. Unless you are hiding. Whether for or against. Whatever it’s about.

 

In my childhood, I could not hide my illness, which arose from my genetic defect. How could I hide it? In kindergarten and at school one noticed absence very quickly. I was often absent because I had to go to the hospital on a weekly basis, or I was often sick. A susceptible little sick boy. And since the rumors already worked great in elementary school, everyone knew immediately that the little boy was vulnerable and sick. One effect was – and I do not remember much, but that one, yes I do – was that during school breaks I never played football in one of the two teams. I was a child and was marginalized. There was no like-minded group that would have comforted me. I was the only one in the whole school with this genetic defect. In the cases where the teams did not “pay up” in terms of number of player, because it could not play 5 against 4, I was elected last. Nice was the pure honesty, which I learned then, because when I was last chosen, the team captain immediately came up with a “great, now we have the sick guy”. At that time, I thought that I knew who I was. The sick guy. Nope. Not at all! Today I know that I was so seen by the others back then. I should find out who I am later in my life.

Let’s continue … when I was finally allowed to play, I was not allowed to do it. Nobody from my team passed the ball to me, for two reasons. For one, I could lose him right away, because I was the little sick boy. On the other hand, the other kids were afraid that I would hurt myself, because I was so vulnerable. So I belonged, I was in the game, but not at the same time.

EXACTLY this is how people around you feel like. Even if they do not tell you. People who are strangers here, people who have a handicap, people who have fears, people who finally want to live their lives, but do not dare to do it, people who give everything for their boss – and much more – but in the process getting more and more unhappy because “The Big Boss” … oh, we already had that …

In 2018, you are more courageous, for others, for you, for all the other years that come afterwards. You are not alone. Seek the impact in your life.

 

 

#BeBrave – and go with the brave ones. Make friends. Unite. Blast boundaries.

 

Do you have a comment about this? Are you brave enough to tell it? So, show me your courage.